My Munificent Seven

Cellobella – she of that most-radiant of blogs ‘Redsultana.com’ – has tagged me for a meme.

‘See that there? That’s one of those great sentences that would have meant absolutely nothing ten years ago. Imagine H.G. Wells appearing in my room after defeating the Ewoks from the future (come on - you know what I mean!) and me saying that sentence to him – how confused and insecure-in-himself would he then almost immediately become?


So – tagged for a meme, eh?

Allrightythen, I have to list seven useful things about myself. ‘Bit tough that. I generally have myself down as being about as useful as a chocolate teapot, or as useful as t**s on a b**l (sorry, that last word was ‘Bull’ – I went a bit asterisk-crazy there for a sec.)

But I’ll give it a go:
  1. I can boil the perfect soft-boiled egg every time. I blogged on my infallible condensation method once. If you can’t see why this is useful then you’re a fool, man, do you hear me? A damned fool.
  2. I can crack my knuckles twenty times in one knuckle-cracking-session. Invaluable when the person in the seat in front of you is talking too much during the movie.
  3. I can remember lots and lots of song lyrics. I can’t sing but I can hide behind the maroon curtain and prompt you with the words as and when you need them.
  4. I can play any tune on my face – either my tapping my cheek/teeth/head or, more effectively, by putting a ruler in front of my mouth and tapping that. ‘Popcorn’ by Hot Butter is my specialty.
  5. I wash up other peoples dishes wherever I go. This is undoubtedly my most useful trait.
  6. I can play the accordion. But I never-ever do.
  7. I can’t ride a bike. This is useful because you can hold yourself up in comparison to me and see what a great person you are and what an intolerable speck of humanity I am.

I’m not actually going to tag anyone. Sorry. If you like it and wanna do it, please be my guest.

Incidentally, just in case old HG does drop by in his DeLorean (eh??) How do you pronounce the word ‘Meme’? Is it ‘Mem’ derived from Memorandum or is it ‘Mee-mee’ as in ‘A memo about me’ (also derived from Memorandum)?

Perhaps someone could let me know.

That would be… useful.

29 comments:

Matthew S. Urdan said...

Okaym, my Irish friend, let's test you....complete the lyrics: "I can still recall..."

Let's see how good you really are!

Slainte!

Ken Armstrong said...

"... our last summer?"

Matthew's throwing ABBA at me!

If the bike thing hasn't already ruined my street-cred, you've just nailed it, my white-water-rafting-friend!

CelloBella said...

Ha!

I knew I liked you for a reason... dishes... anytime you're in Perth...

And you think you know lyrics? Try this:

http://www.yetanotherdot.com/asp/80s.html

I scored 22.5.

Pathetic.
:)

Jenaisle said...

LOL, I always smile when I read your posts. They are funny and good. Perhaps it is pronounced as "meh - meh" , like a goat's bleat? Just guessing. Happy blogging.

Rachel Fox said...

Maybe you can't ride a bike because your knuckles are knackered from all that cracking.

Jim Murdoch said...

You can hear how 'meme' should be pronounced here. The pop-up window takes a few seconds to appear so be patient.

Ken Armstrong said...

Cool Jim... 'Meeem'. 'Learn something new...

Ah no, Rachel - I *can* click my knuckles but I don't do it much anymore. It's like Spiderman's Dad said before that bad guy got him, "With great power comes great responsibility".

Jenaisle - 'Meh' is actually a word that Irish teenagers use as the verbal equivalant to a shrug of the shoulders. Made famous by The Simpsons:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=meh

Cellobella - I would wash your dishes anytime... darn, there's no innuendo in that at all! :)

Tam said...

Delia taught me how to correctly soft boil an egg. It's a useful skill I must agree.

btw, Did you really threaten that guy with a replica gun in the middle of the cinema?

Ken Armstrong said...

Tam: 'tis best to keep a thin veil drawn over the boundary twixt fiction and bare-faced-lies ;)

Matthew S. Urdan said...

NICE, Ken...

OK, let's try one more:

"I can see that it won't be long..."

Ken Armstrong said...

Naw... you've got me there.
I'm not *that* big of an Abba fan

:)

Matthew S. Urdan said...

I can see that it won't be long
You grow cold when you keep holding on
You know you've changed and your words they lie
That's something you can't deny
I know there's something going on
I know there's something going on

I know it won't be long
Won't be long before you're gone
There's something going on
There's something going on

I know a good thing must come to an end
But it's hard to take loosing a friend
I know what you think and what's in your mind
So darling don't pretend
I know there's something going on...

--Frida

Wikipedia Entry:

"I Know There's Something Going On" was a song recorded in 1982 by ABBA singer Anni-Frid Lyngstad (Frida), and was the lead single from her solo-album Something's Going On. The song was a huge hit around the world in 1982.

Song history
Recording began in ABBA's Polar Studio, Stockholm, in February 1982. At the time of the recording, Frida wanted to distance herself from "the typical ABBA pop sound". "I Know There's Something Going On", written by Russ Ballard and produced by Genesis drummer and singer Phil Collins, shows off a rockier edge when compared to ABBA's songs. Collins plays the heavy drumbeat with Daryl Stuermer the rocking guitars.

Soon after its release, the song started climbing the charts around the world and became a massive hit. It hit #1 in France (spending five weeks on top), Belgium, Switzerland and Costa Rica, and was a Top 10 hit throughout Europe as well as in Australia and South Africa. In the United States, the track reached a respectable #13.

This single sold 3.5 million copies worldwide and did far better than the last ABBA singles recorded and released in 1982.

Something's Going On is also the

Cheers!

Fiendish said...

I was all set to tell you how to pronounce "meme" but then I saw you had 12 comments and I just knew someone else would know.

I think I read somewhere that Richard Dawkins came up with it, and it's not specifically applicable to the Internet. He wanted a word that sounded like "gene". Or something...

Nice post. I can't cycle either.

tashabud said...

As always, I enjoy reading your posts even though I don't leave a message all the time. I also enjoy reading everyone else's comments. It's like watching friends having great conversations around a table. I hate washing dishes, but I still don't allow my guests wash dishes when I have them for get- togethers.

Rachel Fox said...

All these comments and none of us have mentioned the playing a tune on your face business...So do you practise? Did you have a teacher? Do you still do it or is it, like the knuckle-cracking, an old habit more or less forgotten?

Ken Armstrong said...

Fiendish - you can't??? I didn't know that! You look like you can - a black lady-like one with a wicker basket in front with baguettes and grapes inside (this is all meant to sound complimentary, 'not sure it's working out).

Tashabud - your comments about guests around a table makes me very happy, thanks.

Rachel - I don't really practice except insofar as I do it as a bit of a nervous tic sometimes and that helps keeps me in trim. It's the oddest thing, name a tune and I can tap it out, I have absolutely no idea how I do it.

Fiendish said...

Ken: No, I'm very complimented. I would *love* to be able to cycle the way you describe, but unfortunately all I can manage is a few exhausting and unsteady pedals before I wobble to a halt.

Perhaps it's a matter of practice?

Jenaisle said...

You are right Tasha, This is a great blog, and you promise not to let me wash dishes? lol.

Ohio Real Estate said...

Damn you CelloBella... I almost missed a sunset because of that quiz! Gah... 44.9 -- Spellings!

Ken... You can ride a bike. You've just never had the right teacher.

Never understood how someone could eat soft boiled eggs.

I have the same desire for dishes and soap. Cleaning other people's houses is so much easier and fun.

My comment wasn't as long as Matt's.

Mike said...

Ken, just so you know, my dear Bonnie can't ride a bike either, or drive a car. If she can't get there walking, or riding with someone, she just can't get there.

I'm with you on the knuckle cracking thing. My two middle fingers will consistently pop over and over. Maybe they're asking me to give them a workout more often. Great for icking people out, though.

Rachel Fox said...

This really confused me...this repeating posts business...like reliving things...I thought it was a new one till I saw myself in the comments...my younger self...
x

Ken Armstrong said...

Ohio Real Estate: "Gah... 44.9 -- Spellings!" I don't understand... (weeps) :)

Mike: All my knuckle cracking of my youth now means that my hands tell me when it's going to rain. So all you youngsters who come here to hang out - don't do it! :)

Rachel: I feel bad for confusing you, I'm really sorry. You look even better now that you did at the time of your first comment. :)

Susan said...

So envious of the knuckle-cracking and the face-playing! LOL

Laura said...

I can't tie a cherry stem with my tongue or anything like that. It will take me awhile to come up with a list of multi-talents like yours. Very impressive in an off-beat, slightly useless way. I am very good at being distracted and skimming. I'm actually already reading your next post already. (Before you've even written it!) If only I could still remember what I was here for in the first place...

Laura said...

Washing dishes leads to washing windows. On the check out line we would talk about the men that came in and I'd say which of them I'd let come over to wash my windows. When the customers thinned out we would talk about what the men would be allowed to wear while they washed the windows. It's so much fun being the nice girl sometimes. No one suspects you of having hidden dark and evil thoughts.

Alan said...

You can play the accordian.....toooooofunnnieeeeeeee

Polka Anyone ????

(Very happy I'm across the pond right now)

hope said...

Deja Vu is good for us, right? :)

Well rather than discuss your um..skills...I will thank you for boldly going where I feared to go: actually asking for a pronunciation of meme.

Tell you the truth, since memes all seem to be in the "tell me about you" vein, in my head I always heard it as "Me! Me!", hand raised high, like the teacher's pet. :)

#167 Dad said...

Wow, I usually pretty much find this meme business annoying...
but you're version is actually funny.

Dave King said...

I can play the accordian - just can't get a tune out of the damned thing!