Things I Do...

Recently, I've been writing a song lyric or two, as I do sometimes.

There's never any music, unless I borrow a tune from somebody else. I do that sometimes too - I call it a 'Tribute'.

Anyway, this is an older lyric of mine. I posted it once before, back when I had a total of one reader. So sorry for the repetition Catherine!

Someone I know thinks this is actually a poem. I don't, it was written by me after all.

Oh, and if anyone thinks they might have a tune for this thing, do please let me know.

Things I Do Since I Took Up With You

Look left and right when crossing the street
Cut all the fat off of my meat
Eat unripe bananas for a treat
Read small books on the loo

These are things I’ve started to do
Since I took up with you

Brush my teeth three times a day
Eat my dinner off a tray
Stop kicking mutts out of my way
Wear red things when I’m blue

These are things I’ve started to do
Since I took up with you

Speak to guys about my fears
Come out of movies in floods of tears
Shave all the hairs off of my ears
And off my earlobes too

These are things I’ve started to do
Since I took up with you

Use both my hands now when I steer
Leave a little of my beer
Go to church three times a year
Instead of only two

These are things I’ve started to do
Since I took up with you

Close the windows as I drive
Apply the handbrake when I arrive
Thank my stars that I’m alive
And smile the whole day through

These are things I’ve started to do
Since I took up with you

(c) Ken Armstrong


Catherine @ Sharp Words said...

That was Good! Get yourself some music and you can be the Irish Eurovision entry for 2009. :) I can see it either with a very jaunty happy tune, or a dark one in a minor key so that the lyrics come out sounding all ironic...

Donnie---Darko said...

That was brilliant ken:)

didn't realise you were on this too :)

I'm going to start adding good threads to my blog so don't check it yet :) haha well done!

-DecMeadow said...

Indeed! Thanks so much for commenting :)

Your blog is full of wonderful things. I love the lyric :)

Nerual said...

oooh I MUCHLY like this!!!

very muchly!!!


Ametyl (from the Bebo world)

R. Brady Frost said...

Unripe bananas taste of cardboard and offend my teeth!!! Eek!


Susan at Stony River said...

By the way, I second the 2009Eurovision entry.

Deborah Lambson said...

I see it as a happy song too..why do men need women to tell them to shave their ears? :o

hope said...

Know what's fascinating? I started off thinking this was about a woman's influence [especially the ear thing], but then some of it made me wonder if it also wasn't about a man growing into a father, setting an example?

Upbeat tempo're too upbeat to do sad songs.

~willow~ said...

this has a very Beatles-esque sound to me (yeah, there's only words but it "sounds" like the Beatles, go fig!). Very sweet content to the song, actually :)

Cleveland Real Estate said...

I think you should set the lyrics to this beat...

Rap your lyrics and sing your chorus...

I saw "Catherine" linked and standing out. It drew me in. My middle name is "Kathryne". Spoofed again.

Rachel Fox said...

Sounds like a country song to me.

Jena Isle said...

I can compose music for that, but I'm not sure if you'll like the melody. Cheers.

Anonymous said...

This is so funny and touching. I'm glad you posted it again.

Dave King said...

Very clever - in the best sense of the word. I enjoyed reading that. Set to music it would be a wow!

Daisy said...

You're such a romantic! Good thing you remembered the earlobes, too.

How about:
Grew my muscles big and burly
Danced a jig that's very twirly
Toward cats, stopped being surly
Made up with a cat that's curly

Ken Armstrong said...

Hi Catherine-from-months-ago. How come I never replied? Wot a Noob I wuz!! :)

Thank you Donnie Darko - what a good name for a character in a play... hmmm.... ....

Decmeadow - Time has not weakened the joy of your comment. Blessings. :)

Rachel - it sounds like a country song to me too. One of heroes is John Prine and I think I'm JP influenced with this lyric.

Ametyl from the Bebo world. IS it an oxygenated athmosphere, or do I need the mask down there on Bebo-world?

Brady Frost - unripe bananas rock!! (hard).

Susan - Eurovision - mention it to Marian, she might pull a few strings... get Dustin back to do it.

Hi Sweetwater - Definitely a happy song, oh yeah.

Hope: If I wanna be a writer, I have to learn to stop revealing the true meaning and be a bit enigmatic. So... (smirks meaningfully in a rather sickening way and keeps silent) :)

Beatles eh? I hadn't thought of that. Come on Paul, I know you read this....

Cecelia: Wow! I just did that. You've just cooled me up by about 200%. It's not at all what I have in mind but it works... it actually works. How *clever* are you? Go try it peeps, rap the words to the music - too late for Christmas No 1?

Try a little if you fancy it:

Jena: you can do no wrong, you know that.

Hi Koe: It is meant to be a little touching so I'm pleased you thought that.

Hi Dave: Thanks mate. You encourage me, you know that, right?

Daisy: wrote a verse - I've Arrived!! :)

Roisin Dubh said...

"Wear red things when I’m blue"

I thought I was the only one.

"Thank my stars that I’m alive
And smile the whole day through"

This must be some woman/man .

Debbie said...

how is it that I am singing it in my head and you don't have tune yet?

Carol said...


What a fun song, Ken! Definitely made me smile.

Anonymous said...

Ah -- I wish someone would write a song for me :) This is quite lovely and if your wife hasn't read it or doesn't appreciate it, she's not worthy of you (but I'm sure she LOVES it and is VERY worthy!)

More, please!


Ken Armstrong said...

Hi Cleo, Yeah, I have a red sweater that perks me up no end. Go figure. :)

Hi Debbie: As Neil Diamond might say, 'Sing it loud, sing it strong'... how does it go anyway?

Thanks Carol, it's meant to be fun (as well as all the other things I've now probably claimed it's meant to be). The first line was what started me off - and, believe me, that is unusual for me. I always used to run out in the traffic without regard for personal safety. That changed, wonder why? :)

Thank you Margaret, I certainly feel appreciated.

As for a song for you, let's make a start at least.

We used to hide in shadows
the things we could not show.
I knew I thought the world of her
but the world just could not know.

But now we're in the open
and the world can plainly see
that I've got my eye on Margaret
And she's got her eye on me.


Anonymous said...

'Tis a great song. I have no musical ability muself but I found if I started singing it to "When Irish Eyes Are Smiling" I was actually able to make a tune of it - it required some major changes to be sure but starting with that as a starting point seems to be a step in the right direction. It seemed to almost mix with McCartney's "Silly Love Songs" at points if that helps at all. CHEERS!

Anonymous said...

Good things come to those who wait!

crpitt said...

lol @ Catherine's Eurovision comment, it would probably win :) Well if a turkey can do it....

I thought it was cute and loved the photo of the Guniess, ahh Guinesss, Guiness.

Where was I?

crpitt said...

I got carried away with Guinness and spelt it wrong, I hate comment moderation!

Ken Armstrong said...

Hi Canucklehead - try as I might (and it has *not* been pretty) I can't get this to work with 'When Irish Eyes Are Smiling' but I will keep on keepin' on, like the Zimmer-man suggested I do. :)

Miss Tique: True, and a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush and you can take a horse to water but a pencil must be lead... no, wait... :)

Thanks Claire: come over for a big hike sometime I'll buy you a Guniess, Guinesss, Guiness.. (damn)

Kat Mortensen said...

Now this strikes me as Barenaked Ladies sort of song. Send them a copy and see what they think.

Sure you wanted to mention kicking a mutt after the cat fiasco?


Ken Armstrong said...

Hi Kat: Thanks for this, I'm remind myself on Barenaked ladies and see how that works... are they as good as Westlife (kidding).

As for mentioning mutts - I am what is known locally as a 'Divil-for-punishment'.

(Yeats said 'Hi')

McGuire said...

Great poem!

Interesting to read all the quirks and idiosyncracies you have garnered since embarking on this relationship. Endearing in places and comic too.

Dare I say, sweet, as though I had simply overheard the sincere conversation between two lovers.

Gerry Mulvenna said...

Following a pleasant exchange of tweets last night, I printed out the lyrics and tried some music. For good or bad the first idea I tried seemed to fit. Listen to or download the MP3. (I'm just playing my son's 3/4 size guitar...)