Back from a week’s holiday in the sun. Last week’s post covered that a bit. Some people seem to think I invented the German Lady with the Rubber Duck. I am here to tell you that I did not.
We went to
Lanzarote. A place we’ve been to a couple of times before. We like it and ease
of access is a key consideration in choosing to go back there. We can be in the
airport in 30 minutes, The airport is small and easy to get through, the plane is
generally timely, and we’re home again shortly after we land. The place is nice
too. It suits us.
I didn’t
say where I was in last week’s post. I’ve thought about the reasoning behind
this decision and it’s mostly because I didn’t want you to know where I was.
For many years I had one holiday a year and that was Christmas at home (my
delight). Lately, I’ve tried to take one additional week, and, in that week, I
find I crave a level of isolation and escape from the norm. Whatever book I am
in the middle of reading, I don’t want to continue reading in that week.
Whoever I have been talking to, I don’t want to continue talking to. Just me
and the Lovely Patricia, on our own, in a different sort of a week. I needed it
to be that kind of something different and it was.
In this
week, I spent a little time contemplating the real estate around the swimming
pool. What do we like to call them? I tend to call them ‘Li-lows’ but that
doesn’t work in Google very well. I think a more correct phrase is ‘Sun Lounger’
though I’ve never said that before, to the best of my knowledge. Anyway, I
reckon you know what I mean. I’m talking about the equipment around the pool
that you lie on to catch the sun.
Lest you be
in any doubt, can I say that they are the things that people put towels on in
the early morning to claim their space for later when the sun come up more. Now
you definitely know what I mean.
And, indeed,
therein lies the rub, and I’m not referring to suntan lotion.
The
poolside real estate of the sun lounger is a game that many people engage in during
their holidays, and it is one I prefer to avoid if at all possible. I can be
boringly territorial if I allow myself license to be that way, so I try very hard
not to.
You know
the game. People get up at silly o’clock to stumble out and get their towels on
the best sun loungers, then they stumble back to bed, secure in the knowledge
that their own little bit of poolside real estate is secured for the day. The
sloths and unambitious fools who arrive after breakfast hoping for a poolside
resting place can go and whistle Dixie for it. The towel is down and, in a more
recent development of which I was not aware, it is clipped to the sun lounger
with large multi-coloured clothes pegs which seem to add even more authority to
the staked claim on the bed, even though the claim holder is still firmly abed
scratching their arse.
If you
sense a certain irritation at this practice, then you may not be completely
wrong. The sight of two prime ‘Li-Lows’ broiling empty through an entire day while
tamer mortals perch in the shadow of the lift shaft is something that could
evoke feelings if I let it. But I try not to let it. This, after all, is my
week away from the world and the petty politics of poolside real estate is something
I am happier staying out of. I find a sun lounger somewhere, as I’m generally
early anyway, and when I go somewhere I bring my towel with me and I find another
one when I come back (though, generally the original one is still there). I avoid
the messiness.
Though I do
rather enjoy watching it sometimes. The immense English Lady with the Gold Lamé
one-piece who arrives like a cloud and breast strokes in a highly passive-aggressive
fashion up and down the pool, puffing and blowing, and glaring at the empty be-toweled
loungers as if they were the vehicles through which her entire family has been
kidnapped. A part of me asks myself what she expected, arriving down at 10.30am
with her tepid hangover and her sun-drenched Jeffrey Archer. Another part of me feels
her pain. I rather wish she would storm over, remove the circus clothes pegs
and launch the offending towel into the centre of the pool before planting herself firmly
on the reclaimed territory. But she doesn’t. She retires to a chair in the corner
and complains to anyone who will listen to her.
The day
passes. I don’t spend much time on the sun loungers by the pool. I tend to burn
easily and it’s not a sensation I enjoy. I watch the ebb and flow of people
from a safe distance, from behind my sunglasses, from under my sun-umbrella,
and from around my book. I steer clear and am the happier for it.
By five o’clock
in the afternoon, the pool is vacated.
This
mystifies me a bit. For me it’s the very best part of the day. There is still plenty
of warmth and sunshine all around, but a part of the sting has been removed
from the solar rays. The pool is nice and roomy, and one can take the sun
lounger of one’s choice as nobody else gives a toss about them.
It makes me
think something but it’s not something I’ve managed to reach any great moral or logical conclusion about. It’s just simply how something like the common ‘Li-Low’ can
be so prized and fought over and contested in one hour and be completely
unwanted and disregarded in the next.
It speaks
to me of life and the things in our lives. The things that are so all-consuming
and great and terrible and wonderful and scary and unavoidable and massive and…
and… you know… big. Yet tomorrow, or next month or next year, they will all be
as naught.
I walk among
the sun loungers when everyone else has gone. I go up on the roof deck and look out
over the town. People are on to the next thing, preparing for their holiday
evening. Tomorrow, it will all kick off again.
I think…
A drink,
perhaps.
Yes. Just a
small one. Before dinner.
I can't say for sure but I'm pretty sure I've never lounged on a Li-Low. I may have lay down on one but likely would've got bored very quickly. Never one for lying in the sun, me. My dad, on the other hand, loved it. He worked constant nights for the last, I dunno, fifteen years and, during the summers, would sleep in the garden and it was our job to go out every now and then and get him to turn over. Our next door neighbour was even worse than my dad. It could be drizzling and he'd lie on. I mean it's like golfing in the snow; I just don't get it.
ReplyDeleteWe never went on holidays when I was a kid, just the annual religious convention, so the whole pool scenario is quite alien to me. I know of it from watching TV but I never felt like it was something I was missing out on. And the towel thing! Sheesh! Who needs the stress?
I do get the idea of making a complete break from the rest of your life. Sadly, as an adult, I could never do that. I worked on my own little work related projects during holidays. And you wonder why I burned out every seven or eight years. The only exception was just after Carrie and I got married and she took me to the States to prove to her kin I wasn't an axe murderer and I pretty much spent the entire fortnight shopping for books and CDs most of which I could've bought easily in the UK.