Peein’ on a Jet Plane

(Written after poor Gérard Depardieu was placed in an intolerable position on a plane)


Well my bags are on
We’re up a mile
I’ll have to wee out in the aisle
I hate to do it but I have no choice
Me bladder’s breakin’, feels like hell
The steward’s waitin’, he’s rung his bell
I haven’t been this ‘caught-short’ in a while


My Piss
He won’t wait for me
So mind my auld prostate for me
Hold this bottle while I try to go
Cause I’m pee-in’ on a jet plane
Wonder will they let me on again
Oh babe, I had to go
Uh oh, uh ohhh…

There’s only so long I could hold you in
On account of I had too much gin
But a man’s gotta wee when he’s gotta wee.
Every drink I saw I thought of you
Thank heavens I don’t need a poo
I hope this bottle’s big enough for me.


(everybody)
My Piss
He won’t wait for me
So mind my auld prostate for me
Hold this bottle while I try to go
Cause I’m pee-in’ on a jet plane
Wonder will they let me on again
Oh babe, I had to go
Uh oh, uh ohhh…

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